Why I Love Midwives

I never knew what a midwife was or how it could be to have one until I was pregnant with my second son.  I had not succeeded at having the natural birth I wanted the first time around, and decided I would do what I could the second time to have one.  I finally found out where the midwives were in Wilmington (that was quite a search) and was able to come under their care.  I was so shocked the first time I had a prenatal appointment with one.  She sat down and talked to me about my personal life and my first birth experience.  She took her time and was gentle with the exams.  When I told her how I wanted a natural delivery, but was a little unsure if I could do it after having the epidural with my first, she reassured me: "Your first birth was just practice.  This time you know what to expect and you can do it." And she never stopped believing in me.  Even after the birth as I looked around at my midwife, the L&D nurse, my doula, and my husband I said (in my over-excited, I just pushed a baby out voice), "We did it!"  My midwife looked at me and said, "No, YOU are the one who did it.  We're amazed at your strength!"  She put it all back on me.  That's what midwives do.  They are there to support and build confidence in mothers to birth their own babies.  AND they have all the medical knowledge necessary should something go wrong. They can do epidurals for women who don't want a natural birth but want the support of a midwife.  The only thing they don't do is surgery.  I had another great experience with the midwife I had with my third.  We decided to have a home birth and so had a midwife who had been doing births for 30+ years, and decided to open a home birth practice.  Every visit I had with her was so much more than a prenatal exam.  It was a "visit."  She became a dear friend to my husband and I.  Once towards the end of my pregnancy I caught 3 infections all at once.  I finally realized I couldn't just get past it on my own with vitamins and water and called her.  I hadn't slept a full night in 3 weeks.  She was genuinely concerned for me and said, "Don't you ever go even a few nights without sleeping again and not call me!  That's what I'm here for!"  She wrote me a prescription (no need to even go to a Urgent Care or whatever) and sent me home, calling and checking on me the next day.  She stalked my Facebook :)  I found this funny, but so appreciated at the same time because she really wanted to make sure I was okay, and she was not merely concerned about my physical needs, but my emotional ones as well.  In knowing that I had suffered PPD after my second pregnancy, she helped me prepare to prevent that the third time (and I didn't have it!).  And her postpartum support was AMAZING.  I tear up thinking about her sitting on a stool in my bedroom, looking me in the eyes and asking, "Melissa, how are you doing?"  And what I heard was so much more than those few words.  I loved how she always respected  and supported my beliefs about God and life, and never pushed her personal ones on me.  She was okay with me just being myself.  So why do I love midwives?  They believe in the natural process of birth and give a woman's body time to bring forth a baby.  And, they believe in WOMEN.